“Transgender Day of Remembrance”

Gender and Sexual Diversity Justice Team: Michelle Shouse, Patricia Parcells, Becca Bedell, Rachel Kohler, Rev. Jill McAllister

In Unitarian Universalism, freedom means the freedom of each individual to claim their own identity – to not be defined by others or social norms. Transgender people find this freedom hard to come by in most places – indeed many parts of our wider community are dangerous for trans folks. How can we as a congregation help provide more safety and support for all? 

Prayer with the Family

November’s tool in the Family Faith Formation Toolkit is prayer! Pop over to the RE news page and read about the importance of prayer (even when you’re not cozy with the idea of God), a short and easy formula for prayer (in case you’re feeling rusty), and links to inspiring resources, all to help you grow in strength as the spiritual leader of your family!

Prayer can feel like a loaded word, especially if you have an itchy relationship with the term “god.” Still, children have an innate desire to connect with something bigger than themselves, and parents and grandparents are their best spiritual guides. Even if you’re not a fan of the G word, you can teach your child how to pray.

Why pray? Many studies by secular scientists find that prayer can result in reduced anxiety and increased calm and well-being. It’s a great tool to have in your family’s spiritual toolbox!

Not sure how to get started with prayer? Back in the Summer, Reverend Jill McAllister gave us a simple formula for prayer that anyone can use.

  • address your source of strength
  • name your complaint
  • confess your trust
  • add a petition
  • express praise & gratitude

EX: Dear Spirit of Love, this world & it news cycles are too much to bear! Love is the only thing I know that can fix this. Please blanket this world in your healing power. Thank you for being a force for good that’s always available.

“I’d go out into a great big field all alone or into the deep, deep woods and I’d look up into the sky…up…up…up into that lovely blue sky that looks as if there was no end to its blueness and then I’d just feel a prayer.”

That’s just one way to pray. I was twelve the first time I heard Anne Shirley’s ideas about prayer. I knew immediately, “That’s the right way to pray!” For me, anyway.

Some people like to pray with ancient language written in far away places. Some prefer to chant prayers or sing them out loud. Some people like blessings, like those written by Kate Bowler in her book Bless the Lives We Actually Have.

Do you remember how you learned to pray? Who taught you? How did you feel? Consider sharing that experience with your children or grandchildren. Remember, there’s no wrong way to connect with the sacred.

A member of our recent Spiritual Practices workshop found their way to my inbox with a request. “Can we take the word sacred out of the workshop so that people who don’t believe in God will feel welcome?” I want to share with you what I shared with this kind-hearted soul. One definition for “the Sacred” is God. Yes. But another definition I’ve seen used is that sacred refers to anything worthy of awe and wonder. You don’t have to believe in God to experience things that are larger than yourself and inspire a sense of awe. Awe is part of the human experience, and prayer is a way to commune with that. What better gift could we give our families than a framework they can use to regularly connect with the sacred?

Homework for Caregivers

If it’s been a while since you prayed, try out Jill’s 5-step plan for prayer and see how it goes. Pay attention to how you feel in your body when you practice prayer. Do you feel tense? Do scratchy feelings well up reminding you of ways that prayer has been weaponized against you in the past? Are you reminded of people who treat prayer like a divine vending machine, always asking for things to be just the way they want them? Or maybe you feel a melting sense of relief when you connect to something that makes you feel small. Maybe it’s comforting to be reminded that you’re not responsible for everything. That something or someone else can handle some of the care of the world and its people.

As you weigh how things are within you, consider your hopes for the children in your life. Are you hopeful that they can connect with their smallness as well as their power? Are there ways you can help your child voice their needs and wants without the entitlement that comes from the ATM-style prayer? Is there a value, to you, in this kind of practice?

These big questions are best when explored with a parenting partner, a friend, or a mentor. Consider calling up someone in your circle of support and asking them to discuss them with you. When you feel ready, discuss them with your kiddos. You might be surprised what you learn.

And, as always, if you want to pop in and discuss prayer or anything else, my door is always open!

Young Adult Pizza Hour

Every 4th Sunday of the month, the young(er) adults of the UUFC are invited to gather after the service to enjoy pizza and conversation together, to deepen social connections between the two newest adult generations of our culture. The term “young adult” is a wiggly one, especially in today’s social climate, where some Millennials identify more with the elder Gen X, while others find they have more in common with the younger Gen Z. As such, our Young Adult Pizza Hour attracts quite the spectrum, a delightful mix of 18 year-old college freshmen all the way to elder Millenials who are starting to inch into their fourth decade. All of these age brackets are welcome!

Every month, regular attendees receive a reminder email in the week leading up to the fourth Sunday with an evocative quote and a few discussion questions to ponder for that month’s meet-up, and then when we get together for pizza (including GF and vegan options) to chat, learn from one another, and commiserate about the struggles of adulting in the world in which we live.

Wheel of the Year Services

Every six weeks or so, we gather at each of the eight points on the Wheel of the Year as an intergenerational community to celebrate holidays from nature-based neo-pagan tradition with story, song, and ritual. Some of these holidays are widely known, like Yule, the Winter Solstice. Some, like Lughnasadh, are not as well recognized. The eight sacred days on the Wheel start with Yule in December, then proceed to Imbolc in February, Ostara in March, Beltane in May, Litha in June, Lughnasadh in August, Mabon in September, Samhain in October, and then right back around the Wheel to Yule. This cycle of celebration echoes the cycles of the changing year, and it honors the interdependent web of which we are all a part,

The stories we tell as part of these services are told together, with an ever-changing cast of voices. Congregants of all ages can volunteer to take roles in these services, bringing the tales alive with costumes, props, and lots of fun congregational interaction. In addition to the services themselves, each point on the Wheel has been recognized as a holiday throughout human history, and so we honor some of these occasions in extra ways, too! A May Pole for Beltane, Hallow’s Eve costumes for Samhain, sing-a-longs for Yule… Honoring the Wheel of the Year calls for celebrations of all kinds! In addition, each point on the Wheel is accompanied by a Celebration Week — a handful of self-guided activities that are appropriate for all ages that deepen understanding and interaction with the truths of each seasonal celebration.

We hope you’ll join us!

YRUU Values Scavenger Hunt

Last Sunday, the YRUU participants went on a scavenger hunt around the building to see if they could find evidence that UUFC members act on their values. Thanks to your awesomeness, they found plenty of clues that the adults in our congregation are actively living into our faith! Thanks for being such excellent UU role models!

Living outdoors during Oregon winter is tough!

Another way you can help support the work of the Daytime Drop-In Center is by donating clothing:

-Men’s pants in sizes 32, 34, 36 preferably

-Men’s/Women’s – warm fleece tops, hoodies, pants, and vests

-Men’s/Women’s -outerwear jackets, especially rain gear and rain-proof hats

-Women’s underwear

-6 – 9 Blankets

-Gloves (we have enough socks, beanies, scarves, men’s underwear)

Drop off items in the UUFC foyer in the large white container with pictures of warm clothing on front or contact Roberta Smith robertasmith2@gmail.com

No Thanksgiving Event

It seems folks have other plans and priorities this year, so the Fellowship is not hosting a Thanksgiving Day meal or gathering. If you are interested inviting others to share some of the day with you at your home, or to go for a walk together, or other activity, please let Rev. Jill McA know – minister@uucorvallis.org.

Inquirer’s Series 11/12

Question Mark

A series of 9 hour-long sessions designed especially for newcomers seeking more information about UUism and the Fellowship AND open to all others who are interested. Sessions take place every Sunday at 11:45 AM Room 6C. This week: Questions and Answers with Rev. Jill McAllister

Thank You! 11/12

Thank You.

Thank you to Betty Shelley for offering a class on garbage and trash awareness and management (at the services auction), and for all who participated, who can help raise the awareness of all of us.

The annual UUFC Men’s Retreat – Recap

In its first off-site meeting since the pandemic, 22 UUFC men met at the Menucha Conference Center Nov. 3-5 to share stories and deep feelings about their lives. Through the lens of engagement, attendees spoke of connecting and disconnecting with others and the lifelong events that had impact on those choices. We met in small and large groups, sang songs, shared our own music and poetry, and spent time in the beautiful Columbia Gorge consolidating our insights and emotions. The UUFC men’s group welcomes all who identify as men and continues to meet weekly, in person at noon on the first Sunday of each month and via Zoom on other Sundays. Contact Jerry Buthmann for details.