Parents Under Stress Supporting Teens Under Stress

Dear Congregation:

Last Sunday, I read parts of a book during the Time for All Ages.  The name of the book is Wildfire, by Breena Bard (see photo).

Because I was speaking to children and youth of all ages, and only had an about five minutes, I lifted up only a few themes from the book.  But this amazing graphic novel covers many themes pertinent to families who have just gone through a tragedy.  In this book, the family loses their farm in rural Oregon during a wildfire and relocates to Portland.  In their effort to be strong for the kids and get through daily logistics, the parents don’t share their grief with their kids.  And in an effort not to be pitied by new friends, the main character, a teen, does not share that she knows one of the boys who started the fire — who is now also in her new Portland school.  By the end of the book, the pressure builds to a point where the parents and teen are finally able to talk about their grief and anger.  This came about in part because of a school teacher who observed the overwhelm in the teen.  One lesson from this is that safe adults outside a family can often be a buffer and link to healing within a family.

When I was 16, my father had a stroke and became paralyzed on his left side.  During that next year, the church was a place where parents of my friends made space for my emotions.  Further, the church’s pastoral counselor offered family counseling sessions where I discovered that saying hard things to my parents could actually lead to all of us feeling better.  

My wish for all of us, of all ages, is that when life sends us painful curveballs, and when stress overwhelms us, that we eventually find our way to talking with our closest loved ones.  And if any part of the Fellowship can help with that, may it be so.

With care,
Rev. Alex

Strength of the Coordinating Council

by Rev. Alex McGee
August 7, 2026

Dear Congregation:

This month the Board and I sat down and reviewed how the interim time is going.  Among the many observations, here is one that some people might not know about:  One of the emerging leadership groups in the congregation is the Coordinating Council.  This Council has always existed, but since I am new to the congregation, I have turned to them with curiosity about what they see as the best way to coordinate teams and procedures.  They are living into responsibility in a fresh way.

These five Council Chairs are Finance, Religious Exploration, Facilities, Connections, and Justice (Worship Council currently doesn’t have a Chair).  Once a month, they have rich discussions about use of space, how to make calendaring accessible, sharing information about budgets, lines of information flow, how to coordinate efforts across teams, and other issues.  I am excited and endeared every month to see them grapple with things that are not clear at first but can find new ways.

Each Team is part of a Council.  Each Team lead has a link to a Council Chair.  When the Team Leads communicate concerns and opportunities to the Council Chair, those can be passed along for creative solutions at the Coordinating Council.  I love seeing how the many perspectives in the room all enrich the Fellowship.

I hope you will connect with your Team Lead about connecting with your Council Chair so that the lines of communication can flow as well as possible.  If you want to learn more, take a look here: https://uucorvallis.org/about/#organizational_structure.

Shared ministry means that not everyone gets what they want all the time, but that we all try to help each other create the Fellowship for the highest good of all.

With care,
Rev. Alex

Hello UUFC:
As we have made it through Spring and into Summer, I have been focusing energy on supporting new lay leaders and planning for Fall events. The Fall will be a time for the congregation to offer input to the Search Committee. Also, classes and workshops will give opportunity to reflect on how we share in community together. My encouragement to you is to continue to find a balance between working for what you love about UUFC while also making space for what others love about UUFC, also.

Some of you have asked about songs or books I quoted in my sermon on Sunday July 19, so here they are:

“Hints of our next right thing can usually be found in our last right thing. … The sacred things we mark from the ending will be brought forth into our beginnings, not necessarily because of an external thing we bring with us but because of the person we have become. … We would do well to take some time to pay attention to those changes, to mark them, to honor them, and see how they might lead us forward.”
p. 308 from book How to Walk into a Room by Emily Freeman

“Wash Your Spirit Clean” by Walela

Give away the things you don’t need
Let it all go and you’ll soon see
And you’ll wash your spirit clean
Wash your spirit clean
Go and pray upon a mountain
Go and pray beside the ocean
And you’ll wash your spirit clean
Wash Your spirit clean
Be grateful for the struggle
Be thankful for the lessons
And you’ll wash your spirit clean
Wash your spirit clean
Give away the things you don’t need
Let it all go and you’ll soon see
And you’ll wash your spirit clean
Wash your spirit clean

You can listen to the song here:
https://youtu.be/vZKcNGEWI9w?si=U4bqWy8uB–84iYd

With care and peace,
Rev. Alex McGee
Interim Minister
July 19, 2026

June 19, 2026
Rev. Alex McGee, serving as Interim Minister

Dear Congregation:

I am writing to lift up three things right now in the life of your UU Fellowship:  history, right relations, and UU connections beyond this town.

First, please take seriously the responsibility as a member to reflect on the history of UUFC.  You have a wonderful opportunity coming up on June 28 or July 16 to hear and see a thoughtful and informative presentation from the Transitions Team.  The Transitions Team is tasked with aiding in the interim process, which includes considering what pressures, opportunities and crossroads affected the Fellowship that you are in today.  I have been impressed over the past six months to see the hundreds of hours that this team has put into gathering UUFC to offer you.  Please look for a chance to talk about UUFC history with the Team members:  Russ Anderson, Laurie Reed, Sheryl Stuart, Rachel Houtman, and Robin Lancaster.

Second, this congregation has utilized a Right Relations Team in the past to help with certain situations.  Last Winter, the Board activated a Right Relations Team to be maintained as a regular resource for listening and facilitating, as well as sharing tools with the congregation.  Right now, the members are Susan Christie, Claudia Hall, Joyce Marvel-Benoist, and Mark Aron, working in conjunction with the Minister.  All are skilled in interpersonal relations, and in addition, are looking at UUA resources designed to strengthen Right Relations Teams.  If you would like to access their assistance, please let me know and I will make the connection, or reach out to one of them and they will circle me in.

Third, I am so rejuvenated by attending General Assembly and UU Ministry Days online this week!  I see such amazingly thoughtful processes, such as having five GA support teams:

  • Covenant Team to help when relations are ruptured
  • Systemic Justice Team to track structural improvements for future events
  • Accessibility Team to reduce barriers to participation
  • Chaplaincy Team to hold spiritual space for individuals
  • Process Team to report at the end of each session how they observed inclusion, lack of inclusion, or other variations from the democratic goals 

So, I wonder…what if UUFC had all five of these teams?  Is that a dream you share?  Do you already achieve some of these in other ways?  I think you do.

Please mark your calendar for June 23-27, 2027 to attend General Assembly in San Jose, CA, or online from here in Corvallis.

My heart is bolstered by a sermon given on Wednesday by the Rev. Joseph Santos-Lyons, who said “belonging means staying in relationship despite disappointment.”  He defined accountability as “mutual and liberating relationship with one another.”  He reflected on times when he was frustrated and let down by Unitarian Universalism.  He observed:  “the most important part of the story is not that I stayed, but the people who helped me stay.”  And so I ask you in the UU Fellowship of Corvallis: how are you practicing belonging, accountability, and helping others stay?

With care,
Rev. Alex McGee
June 2026

To Be Seen

From the Minister, June 12, 2026
by Rev. Alex McGee

One of the greatest gifts one human can give another is the recognition of being seen.  This is why babies thrive under attention from parents and community.  This is why you, or I, under duress, do better when we can share vulnerably with another person and feel “seen.”

As Unitarian Universalists, we can offer this gift to each other and people in society who often have to make trade-offs about being seen.  In June, for Pride month, we seek to make space in which people can bring their whole LGBTQ selves to UUFC.  

Further, the Juneteenth acknowledgement reminds us of how many people lived enslaved lives, and then had to wait to be seen as free.

This matter of “being seen” has arisen in a new form in the past week in our country.  The Department of Defense changed the forms that people fill out when enlisting in the military.  No longer can a person check a box to claim the identity of “Unitarian Universalist.”  Now, they are categorized as “Other.”  

Let us not let this pass unnoticed.  Please reach out to the military that you know who are also UU.  Tell them that you see them!  And read more in this statement from the UUA: https://www.uua.org/pressroom/press-releases/uu-military-chaplains-2026

From the Minister, May 15, 2026

Dear UUFC Congregation:

Wow!  One year ago this month I was reading all about your congregation, from afar.  I examined statistics about your history, your membership, your RE program, and financial matters.  I looked at how many ministers have served you, how the building was built, and milestones important in your congregational life.  I tried to imagine being with you all in role of Interim Minister.  How lucky I was then, to get to interview with the Interim Search committee, who were warm, friendly, organized, and clear.  I then spent many, many more hours, researching Corvallis as a place to live.

This kind of imagining is powerful.  Because you all set a vision, and I was open to a vision, our paths were able to meet and align.  

Please ponder this kind of power.  Please consider the kind of careful preparation that creates a solid, factual foundation, from which the winds of the universe can blow to attract positive energy.

Perhaps there is an area of your life right now where you would like to “get your house in order” and take stock of who you are.  

With care and wonder,

Rev. Alex

From the Minister, May 8, 2026

Along with Spring comes Mothers Day, and I want you to know that I honor the many ways different people experience Mother’s Day.  Please be gentle with yourself as you experience this holiday if it is a difficult one for you.  I wish for you to find nourishment from this poem (below) by Rev. Leah Ongiri (on the staff at the UU congregation in Portland), as she names the complexity of motherhood.  This poem will also be read aloud during the service on Sunday.  Remember you can join by Zoom if you can’t make it to the building.
With care, Rev. Alex

rev.alex.mcgee@uucorvallis.org

The Complexity of Motherhood

On Mother’s Day, let us mark how beautiful and complex it can be to mother and be mothered:
To those who have mothered, we thank you.
To those who rejoice in the work, the role, the presence of mothering and mothers, we celebrate with you.
To those who are in the thick of parenting children of any age, we appreciate you.
To those who experience loss through infertility, abortion, miscarriage, adoption or running away, we mourn with you.
To those who have lost their mothers, we grieve with you.
To those who have endured abuse at the hands of their mothers, we acknowledge you.
To those who experience pain at the marking of this day, we witness you.
To those who are single moms, grandmoms, stepmoms, foster moms, adoptive moms, mentor moms and spiritual moms, we need you.
And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising, we anticipate with you.
May we reflect with gratitude on the wide spectrum of mothering that happens in our lives and in our communities.

By Leah Ongiri

Speaking up and speaking out

April 19, 2026
By the Rev. Alex McGee

Dear UUFC:

This past Thursday, the president of the Unitarian Universal Association sent a letter to US government leaders objecting to the Christian nationalist reasoning behind the current military actions in Iran. You can see the text here.

Please consider this alongside the perspectives of this Sunday’s guest speaker, Logan Isaac. As a military veteran and Christian theologian, he has important perspectives on war from a liberal religious angle. The voices of veterans need to shape the liberal religious responses to current veteran issues. He encouraging us to work for policy changes. You can watch the service video here.

Our Unitarian Universalist values encourage each of us to search for truth and meaning. May the UUA President’s letter and Logan’s sermon help us with that exploration. May we take effective action.

In peace,
Rev. Alex
April 19, 2026

April 10, 2026, by Rev. Alex McGee

Dear Congregation:

When the world is feeling unstable, it can be good to focus on what we are connected to as a whole.  I am motivated by the many endeavors that our Fellowship contributes to on a national level through the Unitarian Universalist Association.  Here is a “State of the Union” report.

https://www.uua.org/pressroom/ingoodfaith/state-association-key-themes

After you read or watch it, I will be curious to hear from you what moves and motivates you!

With care,
Alex

March 27, 2026, by Rev. Alex McGee

Dear UUFC:

This coming Tuesday, March 31, is International Transgender Day of Visibility.  Here at UU Fellowship of Corvallis, what can that mean?  To begin to explore an answer, I offer these words from Nat Esparza, who serves on the staff of the Unitarian Universalist Association in the Southern Region:

If our communities are acts of creation—who are we imagining into them? 
And who are we leaving out?

If that question makes you uncomfortable—good. Discomfort is where change begins.

Whatever you do next, let it be real. 
Let it be rooted in love. 
Let it be imperfect, human, and ongoing.

Because that’s what true community care looks like. 
That’s what liberation demands.

We’ve been visible. Now it’s time to be heard, to be trusted, and to shape what comes next.

In the end, we all want the same thing— 
To feel less alone. 
To be seen. 
To know that our stories, our lives, and our futures truly matter.

I encourage you to read Nat’s whole article here.

And let’s keep seeing, listening, feeling, living…together.

In peace,
Rev. Alex