With all that is escalating in the world around us, I want to provide a few resources that families have found helpful as they navigate the highly personal decisions about how to talk to their children and youth about the terrible things happening in the world. If you have others to add that you feel would be useful to our Fellowship families, please send them to dre@uucorvallis.org
A primary skill we can all develop and use as our children’s first and primary spiritual leaders is developing our capacity for self-regulation. Whatever it is we need to talk to our children about, whether it’s the news or their chores, the potential for positive outcomes is higher when we enter into it with awareness of our own emotions and how they’re participating in the way we are showing up with our children. Without realizing it, the stress we carry in our own bodies can easily spill into our interactions, word choices, patience levels, and more. Dr. Amber Thornton has loads of resources on self-regulation for parents. Below is just one of her many offerings on the topic.
The Fred Rogers Institute has offered a great PDF about talking with children about difficult things in the news. You can access the full 2-page guide by clicking HERE.
“When children bring up
something frightening, it’s
helpful right away to ask them
what they know about it. We
often find that their fantasies
are very different from the
actual truth. What children
probably need to hear most
from us adults, is that they can
talk with us about anything
and that we will do all we
can to keep them safe
in any scary time.
For an at-a-glance list of things to keep in mind for developmentally appropriate conversations at every age and stage, check out this one-sheet from the Children’s Network and Early Risers.
And finally, the National Child Traumatic Stress Network has offered a guide to Talking to Children About the Shooting, which can be accessed HERE.
My door is always open if you find yourself in need of additional resources or thought partnership through this moment in history. I also encourage all of our parents to take advantage of the Parent Connection Dinner on the second Thursday of each month. Strengthening your connections to the village and having a designated place to talk about what’s hard with people who are fielding similar questions and facing similar challenges can make a world of difference!
